Category: tfln

(201):I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has…

(201):
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has “USDA PRIME” tattooed on his ass

(701):Don’t tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while…

(701):
Don’t tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.

(+61):I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.

(+61):
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.

(812):UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING

(812):
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING

(813):His ex told me that she wanted me to “take care…

(813):
His ex told me that she wanted me to “take care of” him but from the way she said it I couldn’t tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.

(414):Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean,…

(414):
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you’ve dug for yourself. asking for a friend

(701):I don’t just want drugs. I deserve drugs.

(701):
I don’t just want drugs. I deserve drugs.

(707):I never imagine I’d say this, but can I ask Jeff for…

(707):
I never imagine I’d say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?

(701):Don’t put me in that position. I am not qualified to…

(701):
Don’t put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.

(501):The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after…

(501):
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound